image by: travis chantar

image by: travis chantar




the “conscious” guys that love to seduce spiritual chicks with their magical dicks.

we’ve all met them …

the ones that stroke your erogenous chakras with their verbal vibrations..


they're in touch with their feminine energy

so they know how to manipulate females more authentically.


they coax that yoni closer with their spiritual pick up lines:


“you bring me so strongly into my masculine”

“I want to protect you, to love you, to pleasure you, I want to ravish you.”

“sex for me is a deeply intimate act, all about honour & consent & enlightenment”

“I LOVE tantra “


new age fuck bois

are just like regular fuck bois


but they are deeper in denial

and further out of integrity


because they cannot walk their talk.


it’s pretty evident once you get naked with one you’ve been duped.


you can tell he doesn’t practice sublimation or non ejaculation.


that his intense self involvement and shiva complex means

he has no interest in your pleasure.


that you are just another jade-egg-toned pussy

for him to shove his wand of light into.


he gets off on himself.


he’s not interested in transparent conversation

in navigating boundaries,

in your orgasms or after care.


the reality of him is a vast disappointment from the conscious-loving-guy act he portrays online.


we need to screen them better sis.


in these incestuous new age communities

the fuck bois run free

because they can hide behind faulty new age philosophy.


“it’s all a reflection”


they gaslight and run from responsibility like the chlamydia tests they never take.


when you find yourself with a spiritual fuck boi

you need to negotiate the contract of the encounter.


get clear.

ask him straight up what he wants

and know before hand what you want.


if it’s purely sexual, tell him what you like & what you want.


get that head girl.

you deserve pleasure, satisfaction & intimacy.


for the love of the goddess

put your pleasure

and the safety of your heart



these spiritual fuck bois are a tricky breed

they use polyamory as an excuse to fuck every girl at ecstatic dance & cuddle puddle parties.


don’t be hypnotised by his third eye

or his over exaggerated hand-on-heart-breaths.


if he’s a new age fuck boi

the best you can hope for

is a one night stand.


if he tells your condoms stop the flow of energy

and ruin the vibration of sexual healing

walk out the door.


just leave.


and thank your rose quartz dildo for all the safe self lovin' she provides.


image by travis chantar


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