FOR THE WOMEN WHO FEEL THEY ARE "NOT ENOUGH"

Image by Hanna Panchenko

 

For the women who feel they’re not enough.

 

Who are all hollow ribs - sucked in tight.

Tortured minds - sleepless nights

Never enough.
Never enough.
Never enough.

Who mould themselves like clay

Malleable - to make themselves palatable

Every day.

 

But behind closed doors they

Harden

Crumble

and

Fall apart.

 

This is for the women who swallow no’s

and are all yes please

I want to
please
you.

Please.

 

This is for the women

who are drowned in the disappointment

of being themselves.

 

Who can’t bare to breathe

through their anxious throats.

 

Who claw at their skin

desperate for freedom.

 

Who bare a wound so

so intimate

and fatal.

of

un
love
able
.

 

and who believe themselves to be branded

untouchable.

 

This is for

the abandoned girls

the abused girls

the girls whose homes taught them nothing of intimacy

but everything of combat

and sent them to bed soul hungry every night.

 

This is for the women who pluck their hearts from their chest

as an offering

on a first date.

 

and every time they leave

they leave

more of themselves behind.

 

legs open in hope

and closed in shame.

going home alone again.

 

 

You have a heart of gold

of steel,

of unbelievable strength and fortitude.

glittering and gritty and cracked.

 

but somehow

still

whole.

 

... and it’s the wholeness you must relentlessly seek.

 

because the hungry heart

will end up eating you

alive.

 

find wholeness.

you must find it.

 

you need to break your jaw open

and spill love all over yourself

 

speak words of worthiness until

you are a drenched mess

 

until your muscles are trembling with the truth of self love

 

self love

that tears

 

sinew and stitches apart

that had grown like lichen over old pains

 

bathe

 

in the bloody agony

of loving yourself

 

of ugly

painful

chest breaking

self love

 

visceral worthiness

is something practised and accumulated

 

you need to chant and scream

be fierce

and tender

 

until you embed

the knowing

deep

into your organs and bloodstream

 

 

you deserve love

 

beyond boys that sweet talk and fuck you empty

 

that you deserve kindness

someone to curl up with in the dark, to stroke each others sorrows and joys

 

that you deserve all the beauty and all the no matter what's

 

 

spend your last money on flowers

stain your fingers with berries

dance until you are all limbs and power.

 

 

we need to learn how to break to re-make

we need to learn the art of mending

of deserving.

 

your soul is sweet

your mind is magic

your heart is golden

 

place your reflection upon your altar.

cherish

you.

 

practice patience.

 

learn intimacy through your own breath

and skin.

 

 

for the women that feel unworthy of love

you are wrong.

 

I promise

they lied.

 

it’s time for the medicine of truth.

administer it every damn day.

 

relentlessly

love

yourself

whole

again.

 

© Copyright 2017 ~ ALANA LOUISE MAY All Rights Reserved

Image by Hanna Panchenko

 

Inspired after an incredible session with Yana Seidl @ Vela Souls which helped me alchemise sorrow into purifying & empowering rage - from self pity into self worth.

Thank you Yana xx

 

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